Self Evaluation... Dun dun dun!!!

Self-Evaluation

Ok I need you to imagine the dooms day music in a movie that happens just before something huge happens. Dun dun dun dun….Here it comes… its gona happen… its inevitable!!!!!

BOO!!!!

Oh well that wasn’t so bad after all.

This is how many of us feel when it comes to self-evaluation. We sometimes view it as low self-esteem or being to self-critical. But really that is just an excuse to not do it. Why are we so turned off by the fact of reviewing our own actions and yet criticizing others comes so easy. Personally I believe there are a few reasons. These same reasons are behind many of our more complicated questions. One is due to our past, broken hearts, lies spoken over us, decisions we have made about who we are ext. The second is that there is a very clear spiritual war going on. The enemy (well my enemy anyway) knows that if we all turned our critical eyes away from others and made it constructive towards ourselves then his job in this war would be so much harder.  The last and most common are simply because we are lazy. It’s easier to point out someone else’s errors because we then don’t have to do the work to fix it. I say all this as we and us because I still do not consider myself to have taken hold of this concept 100%. This is why I’m writing about it. The subject has come up in a few studies I’ve been at which causes me to always analyze what the Spirit is trying to do in the church as a whole. (This is so I can intercede, another blog all together)

Christian or not you should always be looking for ways to improve yourself. Those who say they have nothing they can change for the better someone that will be stuck in a very sad place in their life. We should never stop learning be it for our jobs, how to be parents, how to love our spouses, how to drive better, or whatever you do every day. The point is that biblical principles apply to all whether you believe or not. They are laws set forth since the beginning of time by the One True God and there is no escaping it. This is why so many religions have the same opinions on many things. The biblical principle which gives the basis to this post is to work on your issues and try not to focus so much on everyone else’s issues. This topic ties in pretty closely with what I wrote a few weeks ago. But today I want to go more in depth on the idea of constant self-evaluation.

First off how is this going help me in my daily life? If you are evaluating yourself, often times you see changes you need to make before anyone else notices. Then if it is brought up to you it’s something you have already come to accept and maybe have even looked for solutions. Let me give you an example. Last Sunday one of the things mentioned by our Pastor Gaby was signs of a sleeping heart (you can see the sermon we were discussing here :________________). One of these signs was if you get offensive when a leader gives you constructive criticism.  When I heard this I said, “Oh I receive criticism from my leaders well.” And God said, “At church maybe yes, but is this true at your work?” Ugggg and as always he started showing me times that I had gotten offensive with my coordinators and bosses. “Ok Father, I know you don’t show me these things to make me feel bad. So I receive them and I ask you why did I react that way?”  We had a nice conversation for a few days about this. I even expressed it at a study that we have on Tuesdays. (Confession is a huge tool towards breaking walls of misunderstanding between your heart and your Spirit). So by Wednesday morning I had in mind some things I needed to change about my methods in the class room and the way I would respond to my bosses in the face of criticism. And low and behold guess what happened Wednesday at 1:30. I got called into a meeting regarding a teaching method I had use. It’s never easy to receive correction but I can tell you that the meeting didn’t hurt because it was a confirmation of all that I had already gone through with God. It was pretty cool because everything that was brought up was things that God had already discussed with me and I had already made decisions on how to change. I received what all they had to say, expressed that I agreed with them and explained how I plan to change it. Lastly I asked for and accepted suggestions, and most of all received their suggestions. Although God spoke into my life this doesn’t mean that he hasn’t put people in my path to do so also. These people have years and years of experience in this field and I should take their experience and let it help me to grow faster.Wow!! How quickly God works in us when we are open to it and when we let him flow. Again I’m not saying I am always so open to Him but this is a huge example of why we should be. So many times I have wrestled with God over silly things and every time I give in and let him take over there is so much less damage done to my heart.

There are many books written about self evaluation and maybe if you don’t have Christ in your life you may need to read them. I even suggest you do. The world will be a better place if everyone turns there “change for the better” focus upon themselves. But if you do have Christ in your life this means you also have the Holy Spirit. This is a huge advantage that we have over the rest of the world in this subject (and really in any other subject). The Holy Spirit was sent here to be our constant guide and teacher. He is the one that brings these things to my attention without bringing guilt or fear. This is what prevents things like depression and anxiety. When the Spirit shows me something I could do better he does it in love. And I receive it with my identity firmly planted in Christ. I know that in Gods eyes I’m already this pure person that the Spirit is guiding me to be. So I don’t have to feel guilty about how I acted. What I do need to do is repent and work on changing it. I urge you to sit and ask the Spirit what he sees in your heart to work on. If at that time you start feeling sad, guilty, hatred, or any other negative feeling it IS NOT the Spirit that is guiding you and most likely is your soul (which is usually very confused without the Holy Spirit). If this happens, you can say to yourself, “NO I don’t receive these bitter views of myself. I only receive what the Spirit is giving me.” Just wait a few minutes and see what happens.

Now after the Spirit brings you these revelations he never just leaves you there high and dry. He will help you through the process of change. He will remind you on a daily basis of the decisions you made with Him. He is very helpful in that way. I have also found some very helpful tools on how we can work on our character growth which I will be writing about later but for now let’s just focus on focusing on ourselves and not others. (This is talking about the critical change for the better eye not for other purposes.)

I left a short list of verses to help you further your biblical knowledge on the subject. There are actually a ton more but I don’t want to overwhelm. If you want more verses on the topic leave  a message and I’d be happy to send them to you.

Psalm 32:3-5

Philipians 2:13

Psalm 51:1 The whole 51 is an excellent prayer for your daily life.

Psalm 129:23-24

Mathew 7:3

Luke 6:41

John 14:26, 16:12-15

Acts1:2

What I believe.... (what I love)

Since I started writing again I knew my blog would be shifting in a bit of a new direction. I don't feel the need to change the name or the site because I feel history is important for any reader. I love to know more about the authors that I am reading so Im going to give my readers the chance to find out who I am.

My title for today if you only  read the first line would send out some groans for some people. Which is exactly why I'm writing. A lot of times people have felt that saying "What I believe is..." should be followed by lots of arguments about how people should act and think and move and conduct their lives. Its so sad to me that so many in the world can list off a million things that "Christians" believe and many of those things will be filled to the brim with condemnation. Sure I could fill this blog with things I believe are wrong but I don't believe that's what the Bible tells me to do. Plus a lot of them would be things that I'm working on in my own life. Jesus was clear about how we were suppose to live, he made things very black and white most of the time. He didn't beat around the bush. So yes if you say to me Amanda do you think this or that is ok. I will answer you honestly and say yes or no, but this will not change the way I treat you or love you. Last week we heard a sermon on Judas Escargot. I loved the sermon because it expressed so much of what I have always felt when reading the what I consider one of the saddest parts of the life of Jesus. Every time I read about Jesus telling him, "just go." I cry. I was always sure that Jesus was holding out hope until the very last instant that Judas would change his mind. I don't believe that Judas had to turn Jesus in. Jesus had many enemies in high places they could have captured him any time he was ready for them to. Jesus had disappeared on them a couple times but that is because he knew it wasn't time. Three years before he was sold by Judas, Jesus saw the hurt behind the eyes of a man and had faith that His Father could change that hurt. He spoke life and and purpose into the Judases spirit for three whole years. Clearly he also corrected him because correction is a form of love. But he never rejected him or gave up on him. He ate with him and slept next to him. He loved him!!!! He hoped and I believe prayed that Judas would open his heart to the promises God was giving. I don't believe that he constantly berated him, or geared all of his teachings towards the specific sins Judas was committing or would commit. 

Who am I, you may be thinking, to write about such an opinion. And its ok if your thinking that because I also feel the same way. But that is exactly the point. I am no one important to this world. BUT!!!!! To God I am his precious daughter, loved, and cherished. I am the moving, living, breathing, hands, feet, mouth and body of Christ.  I have lived what Im writing about. And I can tell you many of the "terrible sinners" I have loved and still love in this way are still living their lives the way they were before I met them. And yes this brings me to tears during my times of intercession with the Spirit. But guess what, many are not. Many saw something new, something loving, something they could relate with in the way I live. And those that are still sinning differently than me I know have a seed planted in their hearts. I know that, even if they bash the followers of Christ or just continue living in ways that Jesus clearly said would kill their spirit, they always know who Christ was and is. They know that they are loved by the one true God! How do I know that you might ask. I know because Jesus used my mouth to speak it into their spirits. This gives me the confidence that at some point they will begin to want to be closer and closer to him. 

I know I haven't quoted much of the bible here and this may all look like a bunch of opinion but at the end of the blog I'm going to post verses that explain what Iv been talking about. I don't feel the need to place a scripture behind each sentence because Id rather you look them up and let the Holy Spirit lead you to your revelation. So if you are at all curious about this topic take a look at the scriptures below and before you start reading speak to the Holy Spirit and ask for his guidance. Ask him to give you revelation. With out revelation the scripture is just another book. Please don't just take it from me. Its so important that you grow in your relationship with God and receive it from Him. This post is just a spark of a flame that I know He is going to cultivate in many hearts. 

This morning as I lay in bed discussing this theme with God I asked him to show where in my life I need to be speaking more life and less condemnation. As usually he asked me a simple question that I couldn't answer. Do your kids know what I love about them? Do they know what you love about who they are? My answer was, I hope so. So I asked my middle child. Shes the early bird and so it was just her and I. I said, "Honey, what does mommy love about you?" Her first answers were her hair, her eyes and her cheeks. This is all true she is amazingly beautiful. But it wasn't the answer I'd hoped for. So, I asked her, "what about you, about who you are, about how you act, what parts of that does mommy love?" She got all shy and couldn't answer.  I gave her awhile and tried to explain it in diffrent ways hoping that was why she couldnt answer. She understood the question but nothing came to mind. So I started asking her if mommy loved certain things. For example that she gets completely crazy sometimes and makes us all laugh till we cry. That she has an amazing singing voice and sounds like an angle. That she is creative. Her teachers have told me how driven she is.  Clearly her answer to all these things is yes those are things that mommy loves. What do you think my new goal is? Well I want those to be the items at the fore front of her thinking. My youngest is only four yet answered that she loves people and is nice. Both of which are true. With my oldest her answers were more along the point. She said the way I act because I am happy, that I am creative and smart and that I am beautiful. That I'm a leader. Interestingly she also said, "That I love you." wow that one was powerful. Here is  a thought for prayer time. Should one of our answers to Father God be, because I love you? Oh the things we can learn from our children.
My lesson out of this is that I need to be speaking these things into the life of my middle child. I love how gentle God is with me and my heart. Had this teaching come from anyone else,i may have taken offence. But because it came directly from the heart of my Father I'm excited to make the change.

To end this all and to finish the sentence in the title I want to say I believe that Jesus was a man born from a virgin who lived a normal life trying to please God. And he did!!!!!! He was able to live his life without sinning. I believe when he was obedient and got baptized the Holy Spirit entered his life and changed it drastically. I believe He has given me the same chance to have the same Spirit and to change my life drastically. (He actually expects me to do greater things than Him, Yikes!!!) I believe I sin (maybe different than you) and that all of us should be reaching for the goal of perfection. I believe that I love what God loves which includes you and everyone else. I believe I fail miserably in this aspect and that God continues to help me to get closer to my ultimate goal. 

References:
John 13:18-30
Mathew 24:24
Mark 3:13_18
Mark 6:6_12
Mathew 3:17, 5:43-48
Ok this could go on forever but I think ill stop here. Last and not least: John 13:34,35

My Passion

Most of my readers know that I am christian and love to share of all that God had done in our lives. The day after receiving our Canadian visa denial we went to talk with our pastor at Sozo Church. Our pastors have been used by God many times in our lives over the last couple years and we wanted them to know we were staying and that we were ready to commit 100% to service in the church. Our pastors response  was, and with a straight face,"Are you guys OK?" We said,"Yeah, really we are." He said,"OK can I be happy now." We all laughed and said, "Of course. We are!" Although since this happened one week after our going away party I asked if we were gona get a welcome home party, but that never happened. 

From there we were put in charge of what can be considered the welcoming committee at church. We were faithful in this and as the bible says he who is faithful in little will be given a lot. This happened in August last year. During this time God spoke to me a lot about how I can finally put down roots. That Hes not going to move me again for a long while. This brought me a lot of comfort. God also spoke to us about us serving in the church. We have always worked in the church but more and more God was calling us to do more. In the end of October we were asked to be co-pastors in our church.  This was the fulfillment of a promise God gave me when I first met Issac. Over 10 years ago God told me that Issac would be a pastor. In those 10 years there were times I forgot the promise and times I didn't believe it. I'm thankful that God is faithful even if we are not and even if at times we don't believe Him. Since last October we have seen God move more powerful than ever before. Mainly because we are growing in what we believe about Him and what He can do. And partly because we are believing more about how he sees us. Our Identity in Christ is something that our pastors have helped us to understand. The Holy Spirit has been pushing us and teaching us and guiding us every day and each day we learn to listen to Him more.  

This is the poster that was made to help the church members recognize us and know what we are doing in the church. It says, What we do in Sozo is care for the leaders and the congregation which the Holy Spirit has placed us to pastor and serve. It comes from a verse Acts 20:28-29 (check it out).

These are our pastors and a poster showing our DNA classes. We want all our leaders to not only understand but but be infused with the vision that God has given for Sozo. We love these guys so much and are so thankful to God for placing them on our path. 

I received a word one day saying to me that my hands were made for healing. That I didn't make a mistake with my profession (nursing) but that God wanted to use my hands to heal in the church and for Him now. This was such an awesome word for me and came at a time when I had just reread a poem I wrote when I was a nurse back in the states. When I read it I was in tears because I realized it all applied to my current life which has nothing to do with nursing. But I am still caring for people and helping them heal each and every day. Here is the poem and it can sum up where my passion remains. 

The Greatest Privilege

I get pleasure from their smile. 

I hurt for their hearts pain. 

I give from my healthy body to their broken soul.

Appreciation is the best reward. 

No amount of money can equal someones comfort. 

God has awarded me the greatest honor possible. 

To show his love to the broken. 

Hearing laughter from one with little reason. 

Swells your heart in a way few can understand. 

I can only imagine how Jesus felt as he healed the sick completely, heart and body.

Brings me to tears to even try to imagine. 

Thank you god for what I consider the greatest privilege. 

Organizing my life

As I stated in some of my past blogs my life had been a bit out of control. Not in a bad way just really busy and I wasn't providing the same quality of care in my home. Much of what was going on is that I had all three girls in a dance academy. Don't get me wrong extra activities are good for kids but this is not just any dance school. This place creates professional. They build and train children to know how to have the discipline needed to be a prima ballerina. This is why i had my girls there. Between the three of them I was basically at the dance school every evening between 2-3 hours,  was working a second job and fighting each month to be able to pay for them all three. We had next to no time for house work, homework, alone times (time spent with each child alone) much less to go to the park and play. God began to speak to me about the issue explaining to me that it wasn't necessary. He helped me to analyze my reasons for having them there and most of my reasons were based in the fear that they would grow up to make some of the bad decisions I made as a youth. He helped me to see the reason I made those decisions was from a broken heart and a broken family and had nothing to do with the fact that I  was not passionate about something. Father God is so amazing like that. I love how he helps me to make decisions based on His reality and not mine. Because many times mine is messed up due to old habits or thought processes. So after fighting with God a bit about the ballet issue I relented and right now I couldn't be happier about His decision. Over the last few weeks I have been making my organizers which I use to always use. After the near miss of moving to Canada all my organizing things got trashed and I just never got around to making more. I hope you enjoy them. I know they are not as crafty as many you will find but I also believe in letting my girls help me a lot with this stuff. And to me having them help makes it even more awesome. 

 The above picture is our weekly menu. Its made from part of a Ritz Crackers box covered in scrapbook paper. Then I used cards to leave a space for writing. After placing a couple pretty stickers I put it in a plastic paper cover so that it can be erasable. Each week on Saturday me and my oldest daughter check out my cook books and Pinterest to find what we want to make for school snack (refrigerio) 2 o'clock lunch (comida) and dinner. Usually we don't put breakfast because we know its either cereal, rice or oatmeal. As we write out the menu we keep track of what we need to buy from the store and write it on one of the papers noted below.

 I did this only because tacks seem to constantly disappear and the the papers seem to always be falling into the floor. Si I made little pockets on the tack board for the most frequent items. Also this way we can use recycled paper for the shopping list.

 This is our chore list. I needed something practical. So I have a list of what we have to finish each day, each week and each month. I have three girls, my husband and a cousin who all live here and help with the chores. This is a way each person who does something can mark it off and that way we are doing what needs to be done and not always the same thing. Again this was made from the other side of the cracker box and was placed in a plastic paper cover so it can be used and reused with a dry erase marker. So far this is working perfectly. I have another small calendar in which I put the girls initials if they help each day with a smile on their faces with out grumbling or fighting. They get 1 peso for each day that they clean in this way. Doesn't sound like much but if they do well all 6 days that's 6x3 each week for Moma.

And last but certainly not least our calendar. I had an old dry erase board from when we were giving classes at home. Its frame was completely gone and looked pretty rough. I simply placed scrapbook paper around the boarder and covered it in tape in case the marker got on it it could be erased. Then I drew out the weekly and monthly calendar with sharpie. The monthly calendar doesn't have the month or the day numbers. Also we decided to start working on memory verses for the girls. Its something that I have always treasured from my childhood and the verses I learned continue to help me in my life. Each Saturday when I do my menu I also write out the activities for the week on the weekly calendar. It starts at 2 pm because that is when we get home from school.

Well thats that folks. My life is a well oiled machine....no te crees, hahahahaha.

Is there anybody out there?

So I have been away from my blog for a whole year now. I wrote a post last week and obviously very little movement there. But then I went to check my blog feed and I noticed that the majority of the people I follow haven't blogged in 2-4 YEARS!!! Wait what?!?!?!?!?!? How did this happen. Now I have to clear out my blog feed and find where all my buddy bloggers have gone. Also I want to find some new blogger buddies. I now am teaching in a kinder and I know I can find and give all kinds of inspiration in that aspect. Sure my blog will continue to be about life in Mexico because... well... that's where my life is but I since I no longer have to deal with immigration stuff I don't plan on posting much on that. I'm excited to get back to reading Leslie's posts so I can get my kitchen spiced back up again. The last year was pretty chaotic and with very little organization or free time for me to do the things I love such as crafts, cooking and blogging. But this is a new year and I am confident I will be able to get back on the ball here. As proof I'm going to post a pic of my new whiteboard calendar that I made. Attached to each side will be our menu, grocery list and chores charts.

Disappearing act.

Oh Blogging world, how I have thought of you over the last year and a half. I have actually written many blogs but none of them have left my head and gone into the keypad. I'm wondering if I'm even still on your feeds or if I have lost all my readers. If so I hope to earn  you all back with some new and fresh blogs. My life is wonderful right now and we are very happy in many of the things that are going on.

My last blogs were about the process of getting us to Canada. Long story short we quite our jobs, gave away or sold most of our stuff and had arranged for everything else to be given away then our visas got denied. Mine included. It said I didn't have sufficient reason to be going. Which makes no since because I was enrolled in nursing school and had been accepted by the nursing board in Canada. The day we got our envelopes from the immigration office Issac and I were alone and we opened them in the car. We both just kinda sat and looked out our papers a min trying to understand all the mumbo jumbo that they put on them.

I finally said, "I think mines denied." 

Issac says, "Me to." 

We just looked at each other and traded papers. We read each others papers. 

And I said, "Well that's that. What do we do now?"

We decided the first thing we wanted to do was to go talk to our pastor and tell him we are staying and we are ready to serve in any way he needed us. Then we needed to figure out the car situation. We had already started to sell it to a friend of mine from work and he had paid us half the money. Lastly we had to find a place to live. Our lease was up and after three years of living on the fourth floor we were ready for something new. 

That's right folks there were not tears and no sadness just a sense of we need to get on a roll here. I was actually relieved. Not sure if you remember in any of my blogs but I was pretty worried about not having any family, about the cold, about how we were going to make it, about not having the church family we finally had. And by now I know all those answers here in Mexico. 

We left from the immigration office with all this on our minds and headed to pick up our girls. They were staying with Issacs cousin who had recently moved to our city. When we got there and told them about the denial Issac uncle didn't believe him. He knows how Issac is always joking. So he looked to me and said Amanda really whats going on. 

"Hes telling the truth. Were not going." I said.

"But why are you guys smiling and laughing." he asked. 

That's when I realized that we really were happy about the denial. There was a lot to be done but we were glad to get to stay. 

Our cousins were pretty happy to. The reaction of almost everyone one was,"Can I be happy about this?" And our answer was always "Of course. We are!!" Followed by a big hug. 

Our Church pastors and leaders had thrown us a going away party so when we went to tell our pastor we told him we expected a welcome back party. Hahahahahah We actually had a lot of fun with that one. 

God really started putting everything in order for us right away. A friend from church happened to hear a guy needing to rent his house ASAP and cheap so he set us up with him. Went from a small two bedroom apartment on the fourth floor to a three bedroom house. Yeah!!!!! Way less stairs and more space. We now have been in this house for a year and it looks like were on for the next one also. Our friend who was buying the car understood the situation 100% and let us return them money he had paid us and we kept our car. The owner of the girls ballet school who is also a very good friend sent a recommendation to her kids kinder for me to work as an English teacher. I got an email for the job without even knowing. I went in very skeptical but they gave me a great offer and although last year was a year full of learning a lot of new things and growing a lot I now love love love my job. My husband continued teaching private classes but has recently also gotten a job at a call center. And in October of last year we became co-pastors at our church. (thats a blog in itself) Wow I look back at all that and I see how amazing my God is. 

After the denial God brought me to the verses where Abraham was asked to sacrifice Isaac. Abraham made the long trip knowing what it entailed, answered the questions of his child the best he knew how and continued with this crazy plan God had given him even though in his heart it didn't match up with his dreams that he was sure God had given him. Thankfully as he raised the knife God said,"STOP!!" This was how I felt. That God had given me back my Isaac. The funny thing was that without telling anyone about what I was feeling the following weeks were full of people giving me words of knowledge referring to the same verses and the same theme. That's the great thing about being in a church with a prophetic awakening, you never run out of confirmation on something God is telling you. 

This last year was insane to say the least but things are going great and God has assured me of many things. One of which is more time for the things I love; my family, my church, crafts and my blog. So I will be seeing you all more. And I'm looking forward to getting caught up on all your lives also. 

Bye for now, Ill be back soon. 

The time is upon us.... AHHHHH YEAHHHHHH

Hello everyone, So this post are for those of you who have asked in the past about specifics about our process. I wrote this a couple weeks ago to give to my friends and family because they were getting anxious to hear more about what was going on. I can remember someone telling me not to make to public what all we were doing during our process just in case. But to be honest I believe that God will not let anything bad come from me sharing what he is doing in our lives. Also I reminded myself of why I have this blog in the first place. I was reading some of my old comments from past blogs about Canada and many people had written of the hope it gave them. That is why I blog and that is why I share. So here is the same email I sent to my friends and family (and to be honest by mistake I sent it to the whole world in thanks to a button on gmail... ahi que pena.) Anyway Im excited to share with you all where we are in our process. 

“God, send me anywhere, only go with me. Lay any burden on me, only sustain me. And sever any tie in my heart except the tie that binds my heart to Yours.”

― David Livingstone

That quote was one of my favorites even before I met Issac. As you can imagine it has stuck with me. Many of you have been asking us a lot of questions regarding our plans and some are wondering how you can help. As some of you know this process has been going on over a year with Shawndra helping me with filing paperwork. Various other people helped us out with the fees and such on those applications and papers and we thank you for that. Many of the questions about what is going to happen over the coming months we still can´t answer. What I want to do through this letter is try to share what we do know and what God has shown us is certain in order of importance.

1.       God is with us: If I have learned anything over the last five years is that God is not going to leave us hanging. More than once we have been wondering how we are going to eat dinner the next day and never have we put our kids to bed hungry. (unless they refuse to eat what I cook of course, lol) Although we have paid bills late over the last five years we actually have very little debt and are confident that we will have all paid off before we go. 

2.       God is going to start a church through us. Issac and I both received this revelation during prayer a few months ago and when we came together to talk about it we were both amazed at how clearly God spoke to us both.  We have been speaking with our pastor and his wife here trying to prepare ourselves for this exciting adventure. God is moving in our lives in amazing ways through inner healing and closeness with him. Everything that has happened in our lives has lead us to this and we thank all of you who have had an impact in our walk with Christ.  The relationship between Issac and I has blossomed into something I never thought possible. Mind you Issac and I have always been in love and had a strong bond but God is truly showing us the meaning of his Joy. As excited as I am about school and getting back into a country where nursing will feel more like home I am more excited about the mission. This revelation about the mission came to us right around the same time I got my notification that I was accepted into the Bridge to Canadian Nursing program. I being the Amanda you all know and love began freaking out a bit about what all needed to be done and how impossible it all looks. I thought of course this is why I love organization, why I know Lean, why I love to structure things.  Oddly enough the thought of having a mission on top of the school thing made me stress a bit more. Why you may wonder well if we were going only for my career it wouldn’t be so stressful because, well, we are happy here. So if we screw it up and can’t go…. No biggy we have figured out how to make it down here and have tons of loved ones who are going to be hard to leave.  But now, God… The Big Guy…. My Creator… My Savior is calling me to go and do his work. Ok so this means I have to do everything right to get this done… that I have to plan it out to the T… that I need to be sure that everything works out and is ready when we get there…RIGHT?

Thankfully God said NO WAY. (I literally just took a deep breath when I wrote that.)  During every devotional, prayer time, quiet time ext. God had been telling me No Way and I was trying to listen. My head was saying I wasn’t worried but my heart was going nuts. And I’m pretty sure I was keeping it hid from everyone except God and Issac.  Then a few weeks ago at church during the worship session God was saying to me, “Amanda please stop worrying, I’ve got this. I need you to let me continue your preparation to be a leader, and to open a new place for me to reach my people.” I of course was like, “Gees God, I know …” But really I still didn’t and He knew that.  After the sermon ended and we were in worship again a man who doesn’t know us and knew nothing of Canada grabbed me by the shoulders and said, “Sra. (miss), God wants to tell you that he has a big change coming for you… I think it’s a change of residence or address… I’m not really sure, and also job opportunities. But He wants to tell you he has it under control. You shouldn’t be worrying about the details.” At the moment I was in a bit of shock and could do nothing but thank him. Issac heard what he said and immediately started laughing and gave me a hug.  After church Issac told me that when that man gave me that message that Issac felt God was saying to him we needed to be preparing ourselves for the church plant and not for immigration.  (I have been amazed at how God has been speaking to Issac and I with the same messages) So within a couple hours God gave me the same message three times and finally it sunk in. I can truly say that my heart is at peace and that I know that he is going to supply all the details.  God knows when you need a smack over the head and apparently that’s what I needed. So for the last few weeks I have been focusing on reading, praying, and just loving God. Please pray for Issac and I that we can continue to move closer and closer to God and continue to be on his frequency.

3.       The next fact that is that I have a required student orientation that is in AUGUST and I start classes this coming October so my family needs to be in Canada and somewhat settled before then.  AHHHHHH so excited to be a student again!!!!!!!

4.       Our family easily qualifies for the visas. And Alana will actually be ahead of her classmates when we get there so there is nothing to worry about if she has to skip a month or so of school during the move.  More so because she’s receiving all A´s this year in school, sorry had to through that in there, I’m soooooo proud of her.

5.        I need to send the application for my student visa in April so that it is processed in time for me to start classes. This visa automatically gives Issac an open work permit (which means he can apply for any job just like a resident) and the girls’ temporary residency (which gives them permission to go to school).

6.       Due to me going to this nursing process the immigration process is going to be fairly smooth.  But we don’t have the following requisites:

A.      One requisite we do not have are the girls’ passports.

Each passport will cost us $120 US dollars including shipping fees. The total is $360 US dollars. The need for this has been provided and we have ordered our passports they should be here within 3 weeks. YEahhhhh Praise God for his provisions!!!!!!

B.      The other requisite is that we have to prove to the immigration department that we have enough money to provide for our family during the year of school. The plan is that when we get there Issac will quickly get a job and provide for us during the year.  An acquaintance, who is an immigration consult, told me that Issac has an excellent profile and will have no problems finding a job. But that doesn’t help when applying.  The amount we have to prove to immigration that we can access is $37,000 Canadian dollars or a person or company  that will provide a certain amount every month during the year which is $3,000 Canadian dollars per month.  It sounds like a lot when you see it all together like this so I am going to break it down for you. Really its not over the top.  This amount includes:

a.       Schooling (including books)- $14,000

b.      Living expenses for the applicant (me)- $10,000

c.       Living expenses  for the spouse (issac)- $4,000

d.      Living expenses for each dependent- $3,000 each one = $9,000

The idea is that we can get this money as loans or donations and the loans would be paid back within a year or so. Because by then Issac will have his income and within one year when I'm out of school I will also be working. 

C.      As far as money for the move we are going to sell all our stuff to pay for the tickets and such.

D.      Because we are going to show up the whole family together we are going to need somewhere to stay when we get there until we can find housing and such, unless God provides us with that before leaving. Other things we will need are Issacs job, babysitting and Alanas school again not sure if God is going to enlighten us with his plans for these things before or after we go. A few of our friends have friends who live in or near Calgary and we are convinced that God is going to set all that up without much effort on our part. 

The main thing we are asking of our friends and families is prayer and support. Please pray that we continue to listen and keep our attention on God and on his ministry. As far as all the needs we stated above we don’t need prayer that God will provide them because he has already told us he would. We wish for all to pray prayers of thanksgiving that God is moving in hearts and spirits and that those people respond to his calling. We are so very thankful that God has called us to this change and are excited about what he is going to do in our lives and the lives of the girls.

If you feel led to donate or to loan us any of the necessities we stated above you can contact me or you can  click the Donate to Canada button. It’s a paypal account that is in Shawndras name (my younger sister who has helped me out through everything).  We did it that way so that we don’t have to pay fees to change the money from us dollars to pesos then to Canadian dollars. This way there will only be one money exchange fee.  For immigration we will only need to prove that we have access to the account.

Thank you all so much for your love and prayers. Issac and I are overwhelmingly blessed by people who love us and who love our girls. We could never thank God enough for the amount of love he has put into our lives. Thanks so much for believing in us and always supporting our decisions as crazy as they may sound at times. ;)

I plan on writing a longer blog about our new ministry to be honest its what we are most excited about and since I originally wrote this letter God has reveled more and more about His purpose. 

Amanda, Issac, Alana, Joslin and Lilian