Monday, January 18, 2010 my skin...

I of course have been reflecting on this whole thirty thing. I know it is by no means old but it is older than I was before. One thing I was doing was remembering my self at 20 let me tell you I am much more comfortable in my skin and am excited to see where that brings me in the years to come. As a teenager believe it or not I was very comfortable in my skin, I liked who I was and the fact that I was going nowhere was comforting to me. Then thankfully others saw a potential in me that I never saw in myself and I was encouraged to go to nursing school. The first few years of my 20´s was quite confusing, I was giving up a lot of habits that had became (I thought) who I was. I wasn't sure who to be or who I was without them. Slowly but surely as I grew in Christ he helped me to see that those habits had nothing to do with who I truly was. Right when I was becoming comfortable with who I was again I met my husband and the fearful years set in. I was just looking at pictures from then and let me tell you I was happy and comfortable with who I was but fearful about the future. As most of you know our struggles with immigration started shortly after we met which was when I was 24. When I was younger I enjoyed my differences from other people, I actually tried to make them more than they were. The two years that Issac and I lived in separate countries and the last year and a half my differences from the others around me were a bit to strong for me. I now feel I am at a place where I am still very different than those around me but I am comfortable with the amount of difference. I want to always hang on to my American style, beliefs, language, and attitudes (except the worry part). I think part of what has made me more comfortable with the differences around me is that I understand them more now. Although I am regularly baffled by Mexicans I quickly come to understand why they are the way they are. I´m excited about raising and growing my family in the up coming years. I look forward to feeling safe and knowing that my family will not be torn apart by borders and that I can be comfortable with who I am. Here I let out a sigh of relief for the happiness, comfort and security I am feeling. Thank you God for giving me this.


  1. Amanda,
    Let me echo you and say Thank You Dear Lord for helping Amanda become the truly nice person and great wife and mom that she is. Amen!